Ryan le Bar makes contact... perhaps... and wants to sue my ass!

An interesting email in my inbox this morning, as well as a comment which you can all see for yourself under where the Ryan le Bar story was.
My question is this, dear readers... do you believe it's really Ryan? The post is all in capital letters. The email was sent DIRECTLY to me, not via The Gunge Blog email [and I don't think I've really advertised my own email that much]. And the spelling ain't that great in either. So I'm inclined to think it's a not-so-clever reader pulling an early April Fools prank! But just on the off chance, I've removed the story for now, since "Ryan" has his lawyers in LA standing by [despite being a Canadian resident - odd].

Even if it was really Ryan, is someone who has photos in the public domain really able to criticise when someone else uses them, and writes a story about them [clearly fictional, though "Ryan" seems to think it's implying that it's true]? If the name that appeared had been made up, like "Rick le Buff" or whatever, and a small disclaimer saying that all characters are fictional, any similarity to persons living or dead is purely coincidental etc make any difference?

As I said, I honestly believe this is a prank... if not, the author's note at the top of the story seemed to be very true indeed! I mean, come on - if you google his name, this site doesn't appear. How the hell did he find it! [Sorry, Mr le Bar, if you are reading this... but I need a little more proof it's actually you. And I'd ask you're a little more polite next time, throwing offensive language at me just makes me angry.]

I'd really like to hear some views on this!

NEW STORY: Poor Martin

Original story submitted by a Blog reader

Martin was nervous. He was a singer, and he needed some more promotion even though his band was becoming increasingly popular. He looked in the mirror and checked that his long blond hair looked good. This was to be the biggest gig of the year and he couldn't ruin it.

He went out on stage and was greated with a huge scream from the audience. He enjoyed the attention. The compere came out and announced that after they hear the song they'll be a little game which he'd like to play with Martin. Martin sang his latest song and afterwards the compere came out.

"Now, for the surprise - we've selected three of your greatest fans who are here with us today. Please welcome - Christian, Michael and Bjorn"
Chrisitan was tall with black hair and black eyes. Michael was slim, tall and had black hair and blue eyes whilst Bjorn was tall with blonde hair and blue eyes. All guys were well dressed and had taken a lot of care in how they look. They shook hands with Martin and stood at his side whilst the compere explained the so called 'surprise':
"Well we decided that you all deserve a gunging... In order NOT to receive that gunging you must redeem yourselves. I'm going to ask 5 questions. The person who gets most questions correct will not get gunged - but you will have the opportunity to choose two people who will get gunged"From backstage, four buzzers were brought out.

"Right - hands on buzzers - first question - where in the world is Goa?"
Michael buzzed first, "India"
"Correct!, next question, In what year did Christopher Columbus reach the Americas?"
Martin buzzed next "1440?"
"Incorrect - I've got a right mind to gunge you without asking any more questions"
The audience laughed and cheered but this was clearly a joke since the comprere continued asking the questions;
"how many terminals does Gatwick Airport have?"
Bjorn buzzed in "two"
"Correct, next question, what river runs through Rome?"
Michael buzzed in "the Tiber"
"Correct - final question - at the moment Michael is winning - what is the main town of the Orkney Islands?"
No one buzzed. Meanwhile the backstage staff rolled in two huge gunge tanks with yellow thick gunge.

"Time's up guys - that means Michael wins - and that means Michael get's to decide which two of you will get gunged"
Michael could see that all the other guys didn't want to get slimed. He looked at his boyfriend and decided to choose him
"Bjorn is definately getting it - and I think I'll choose Martin since they've been giving each other funny looks all evening"

Bjorn and Martin sighed. They removed their microphones and removed their shoes and socks. The gunge tank door was opened for them and they each went into their respective gunge tank. Martin didn't feel like getting gunged. He kept asking everyone whether he really had to. Once inside he sat down on the stool provided. He kept eyeing the tank above him.
Then he heard the audience roar "three, two, one - GUNGE HIM"

All of a sudden the vat above Martin opened. The gunge was thick and it fell on Martin slowly covering every bit of his long hair. It didn't trickle down. It was so thick it just sat there on top of his head. More lumpy gunge kept on falling. Martin hated it. It would take ages to remove.

Bjorn got his punishment after - His gunge was thick too and just like Martin's it sat on his head flattening his spikes. The gunge kept on trickling down and Bjorn had to remove some of it from his face. He too hated the gunging but they both started laughing.

The audience gave them a round of applause. Martin was let out of the tank and was asked how he felt. He replied that it's probably the worst thing he ever had in his hair. They were both lead to the showers to clean up.

Splatty bye-bye? / Story: William and Ronald

I'll start off with the normal apology that it's been so long since the last update. I've been working full-time recently so the blog has been a bit neglected.

As I'm sure many of you will have already seen, Splat! is set to close at the end of the month [so if you want to buy a show or two, do it quickly!]. Obviously this is pretty sad news. I worked with Pete on Splat for quite some time, and I think together we created something unique - effectively a gunge programme on the net that wasn't solely for gunge fetish fans, but gunge fans in general. And against all the odds [and my own expectations] it actually worked!

Pete has said on the site he is looking into ways of getting the site to continue, but if it doesn't then I'm glad that the site is ending on a high, with Pete moving onto bigger and better things [which sound very exciting - I'm very jealous of him!] rather than nosediving into oblivion. I don't think it can be stressed quite how much work goes into the site and the shows in particular, so well done and thanks to absolutely everyone who was involved with making Splat! a fantastic asset to the online gunge world. We'll miss you, Splat!

NEW STORY TIME!
The models were all in the room waiting for them to be selected. They needed two models to do a TV opening scene of a show. Everynight about almost all tv viewers would see them - how good was that! But only two could be picked. And these two didn't exactly know what they had to do. But at the age of 17 you're willing to do anything as long as you appear on TV.
Two guys were selected William, a 17 year old guy with long dark hair, a tan to die for and brown eyes and Ronald, a 16 year old guy with shorter brown scruffy hair and dark eyes. They both were very happy to be selected. Finally they were picked up for something more than a small paper advert - something which will give them some promotion as models.
They were told to come the next day wearing their school uniform. They both dug out their old school uniforms and put it on. Both were fairly similar - white shirt, blakc trousers, black socks and black shoes and a striped tie. They didn't need their blazers and they left them at home.
As soon as they arrived to the modelling agency they were asked to go into the next room. There they found two gunge tanks. both full of geen gunge at the top. They froze. Just then the manager explained to them that they were going to shoot the opening sequence to the new gunge show.
"the new what?!"
"it's a gunge show" the manager explained "just a couple of shots wiht you two getting doused in gunge, go on get ready"
"but i thought it was...."
before they had any chance of further protests they began getting ready. First they had to remove their shoes and their socks. Once barefoot they decided who had to go first. William decided to get it over and done with. He went in the tank looking up at the mess which stood above him. He didn't want to do it but he took it in his stride - he's a model afterall and he must expect some dirty work every now and then. All of a sudden there was a countdown. This is it, he thought to himself - 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 and then the green gunge fell. It first hit his head and splattered all over his long hair. He tried to wipe it off but more came turning his white shirt green. His hair was a green mess, and although he tried removing it, it was all quite hard to remove and needed several washes. Ronald was laughing his head off at the sight of William covered in green gunge. Just then he felt someone grabbing him by the arm:
"i think it's your turn now!"
He immidiately got serious, and began dreading what was about to happen to him. He was dragging his feet in order not to get gunged but then realised that no matter how long and how hard he'd try he's still going to get it. Once in the gunge tank he saw William being let out from his. He was fully covered. then without any warning the chain was pulled, without giving him the time to get ready.
And all of a sudden the green gunge above him began falling.It flattened his hair and kept on falling on him covering each bit of his hair and trickling down to his white shirt and green tie. It kept on falling for about a minute and then when it stopped he tried wiping it out of his hair.
He was let out of the tank. Both went in the showers to clean off. They both hated it, but they new this was only the beginning...

General updatey-ness

Splat have introduced a new section to their site, showcasing international clips, the first being a promo clip for the German Red Nose Day back in 1998.
The thing I find weird is how there clearly is gunge in [mainly] non-English speaking countries, but they never seem to appear on the net! I'd say most gunge comes from the UK, with the US in second, and very little from elsewhere.
So this should be an interesting feature to watch over the coming weeks and months, as well as a new clip of the rather lovely Andy Rhodes getting a pie sandwich... currently available to buy from the main news page.

If you haven't visited The Gunge Club recently, there's been quite a few good pix added to their HUGE collection, especially with the custard pie pix.

Send us an email if you spot something online that you think we should mention, or if you have your own gunge site that you'd like us to see, send us your stories and comments, blah blah etc etc!